


Hearing His Voice

by Dark_Huntress_Moony



Series: Song Birds [3]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Military Dean, Minor Character Death, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Professor Castiel, War
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-23
Updated: 2013-10-23
Packaged: 2017-12-30 06:35:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,311
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1015342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dark_Huntress_Moony/pseuds/Dark_Huntress_Moony
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean’s a solider, Castiel knew that when they got married. He knew that even though he came ahead of the job in Dean’s heart, that if duty called Dean would go and he would go with a grim determination to come back no matter the cost. Castiel keeps the phone always near him and the ringer always on high, work, sleep, walking the dogs, everywhere he goes his phone is always at his side. He both hates and loves his life, it’s all made right when he hears that voice telling him he is loved.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hearing His Voice

**Author's Note:**

> And I try not to think he won't come home  
> But I'm sleeping with the telephone  
> Something wakes me from where he should be  
> I reach for him; the telephone rings  
> ~~Sleeping with the Telephone by Reba~~

Prologue

~~February 2012~~

Castiel Winchester stood at the airport watching his husband of three months hugging his family good-bye; he stood back not wanting to get in the way as tears started to blur his vision. He had all night with Dean to say good-by, and standing there, his hand clutching tight to the leash of their dog, watching him in his uniform getting ready to get on a plane to a warzone made his throat tight and his heart ache. He bit his lip hard as he watched his brother-in-law clutch at Dean hard, the giant of a man’s shoulders shaking. Mary stood next to her husband, with her hand over her mouth and tears in her eyes. This was an emotional day for them all, Dean was usually just in the reserves, but with how things were going overseas they needed his expertise as a combat medic.

“Cass…” Dean said, pulling his husband out of his thoughts. “Hey don’t look so sad baby, I’m gonna come home.” Strong arms pulled the smaller man into a tight hug.

Castiel clutched at Dean, breathing in the lingering scent that was is husband. “I hate that you have to leave so soon. We just got married.”

Dean sighed and pulled back, lifting his face by the chin. “I know baby. I hate it too, honestly some days the whole war and the country can go fuck themselves, I just got you to say yes after five years.” Dean gave him a crooked smile. “I bet it won’t even be that bad once I get there and they’ll send me home in six months tops. Watch out for Sammy ok? You know he’s a moose who needs someone around to make sure he doesn’t do something stupid.”

“Hey!” Sam squawked with a glare.

Castiel let out a burst of laughter that shocked him and he covered his mouth. “Dean.”

Dean smiled as he pulled something out of his bag and put it in Castiel’s hand. “Here, I bought this just for you; it’s a satellite phone that will be able to get us clear calls when I call you. I promise to try to call every night.”

Castiel’s eyes widened. “Dean, can we afford this?”

He chuckled. “It’s from my, just in case money.”

“That was for the Impala. Why would-”

Dean laid his fingers on Castiel’s lips. “Talking with you is more important than my car. I won’t be driving it for at least two years, so the money is better used to talk to you  
whenever I can. Just remember what I told you about the car.”

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Yeah yeah yeah, drive it around the block once a week and have your dad or Sam check everything to make sure it’s still ok.”

Dean’s smile softened to one of pure love and adoration. “I love you Cass.”

“I love you too Dean.” He smiled as he stood on tip toe and kissed Dean softly as the final boarding call sounded.

Dean pulled back and sighed and hugged his husband tight. “See you later Cass.” He smiled and bent down to the Tibetan Mastiff sitting obediently at Castiel’s side. “You guard him good boy, keep him safe till I come home.” He smiled as the dog licked up his face and gave him a quick scratch behind the ears.

Castiel nodded as his throat closed up as he watched Dean hug his brother, mother, and father all once more before running to his gate. Castiel felt hollow inside as he wrapped his arms around himself, sniffing back tears. He felt a delicate hand on his shoulder and looked to see Mary smiling sadly at him. “C’mon Castiel, come home with us for the night.”

“Oh Mary I couldn’t, what about Cujo?” He asked looking down at the dog. 

“Bring him along; I just don’t want you by yourself tonight. This is hard for all of us, and we Winchesters need to stick together.” Her smile was every bit as warm as her sons and it made Castiel’s heart ache. “I’m sure that old Buster will just hide in my closet. Sam’s staying the night too. We’ll have a big meal, play some games, and watch some movies, whatever we wanna do.”

Castiel smiled at her, “Alright Mary. I’ll come over tonight. Just let me go home and pick up a few things.”

She smiled and kissed his cheek. “Alright, John’s going to fire up the grill and make his whiskey burgers.”

John nodded slipping an arm around Mary. “Yep, feels like a grilling kinda night.”

Castiel smiled as they all started walking out of the airport, each of them heading to their separate cars, promising to see each other in an hour or so. Castiel opened up the door for Cujo to climb into the car and looked up at the clear blue sky. He thanked god for the family he found in the Winchesters after his own found out he was marrying another man. The only contact he had with his family was his elder brother Gabriel. He sighed and shook his head, “Please, God, bring Dean back to me safe and sound.” He whispered to the car before turning on the playlist that Dean had made for him.

Part 1  
~~August 2012--6 months into the Tour~~

Castiel sighed as he sat down at his desk. He was exhausted, and he was thankful that today was test day for his students and he wouldn’t have to do anything but sit there while his classes all took their tests in blissful silence. He set the satalite phone off to the side of his desk and he let his head thunk onto the hard wood with a soft groan. 

“No word from Dean?” A voice asked making the man lift his head.

“Oh, hi Charlie. No, nothing yet.” He sighed as he leaned back watching as the red-head sat on the edge of his desk. Charlie was one of his only work friends, the rest of the professors got under his skin for being gay or other trivial matters. She was good friends with Dean before they got to know each other and it made him feel better when she came over. “It’s been a few weeks Char; I just hope he’s ok.”

Charlie laid her hand on his arm. “Hey, c’mon you know Dean will be ok. He’s a stubborn bastard. We know the war is really bad, and he’s a field medic, he’s needed.”

Castiel sighed. “Yeah I know Charlie, but, I know it’s stupid but I want him home, he said he would be home after six months. Yes I realize that was just Dean talking his big talk and he wouldn’t know, but I just miss him so damned much.”

Charlie got up from her seat and wrapped her arms around him. “Cass do you need the day off? I’ll totally fill in for you, it’s just a test day right? I don’t have classes today and I’ll cover you. I’ll just let Naomi know.”

Castiel sighed, “I can’t Charlie-”

“You can and you will Mr. Winchester.” Naomi said as she walked into his class, dressed in a sharp suit as always. “Charlie can cover your tests today, go home, wait for a call from your husband, and maybe play with your dog. Do whatever you need to do, and when you talk to Dean…tell him we all want him to come home safe.” She smiled softly at him.

Castiel couldn’t help but smile back as he stuffed the phone back in his pocket and grabbed his brief case and jacket. “Thank you Naomi and I will. Charlie the tests are in the top drawer of the desk, I have the answer key at home so if you can-”

“I’ll drop them off after I have them all and we can have some beers and I’ll help you grade don’t worry, I’ll see you tonight.”

He smiled gratefully and ran out the door. He passed a few of his students on the way and smiled and waved, he got to his car and fumbled with the keys as his phone began to blare Kansas Carryon My Wayward Son and he dropped his keys and grabbed the phone. “Hello? Dean!”

Dean’s laugh sounded through the phone making Castiel’s heart skip a beat. “Hey Cass, I’m sorry I haven’t called. How are you baby?”

“Never mind me. Are you ok? Your mother has been bugging me about if I’ve heard from you.”

Dean sighed, “Moms always worried. I’m fine baby, it’s just…ugh I can’t even lie to you it’s bad Cass….like fuck…the shit I see every day, I’ve never seen so much death. And it’s not just our guys, its civilians too. Fuck baby I want to be home so bad, I wanna put this shit hole behind me and be back home with you and Cujo.”

Castiel leaned against his car as tears sprung up in his eyes. “Oh Dean…You’ll be home soon right? You can come home for Christmas; they have to give you that.”

“I can try Cass, but it doesn’t always happen. There’s guys out here that have been here without going home, some for two years. How they’re still sane I have no idea.” Dean paused. “Hey, aren’t you supposed to be teaching?”

“No, Charlie took over for me today because Naomi sent me home, its hell without you Dean, and after not talking to you for nearly a month it’s even worse, I miss you so much that it hurts. I try to act like it doesn’t affect me but it does and my students and co-workers see it. Hell even Gabriel saw it when he came over last week.”

“I know Cass, trust me; I keep your photo in my breast pocket over my heart. You know the one where we were at the beach last summer, when we just got Cujo. It’s my good luck charm; I keep it with me and look at your face every time I leave with a convoy. You keep me going Cass, never forget that.”

“I’ll always be here Dean; I’m waiting for you to come home. You waited for me; it’s only fair I wait for you.”

Dean laughed, “You better wait for me. Because when I get home there will not be a surface in our house that I haven’t had you on. I even plan on making use of that deck.”

Castiel laughed. “I love you my soldier.”

“I love you too angel. Now tell me everything I’m missing out on.”

Castiel smiled as he got on the trunk of his car and started talking to his husband, taking in every word and committing the sound of Dean’s voice even further to his memory. An hour later they finally said their good-byes so Dean could talk to his family before going to bed and Castiel closed his phone letting his head hang down as he tried not to cry. He loved talking to Dean, but he also missed him so much that it nearly caused him physical pain.

“Cass?”

His head snapped up to see his other friend standing in front of him. “Oh, Balthazar. You’re the second person to get the drop on me today.”

Balthazar arched a perfect eyebrow as he adjusted the strap of his bag on his shoulder. “Shouldn’t you be in class?”

Castiel sighed. “Charlie is covering my classes today, it’s only a test. Then she’s gonna come over to help me grade.”

The French Professor nodded, “I’m going to guess that you just got off the phone with Dean? How is he?”

“Homesick, he misses being home.”

“We all miss him coming around for your lunches. He is a good guy and we want him to come back to you, you guys are good together.”

Castiel gave his friend a sad smile. “Thanks Balthy, you are the best friend a guy could ask for.”

Balthazar grinned slapping him on the shoulder. “How about I come over too and I’ll even bring dinner.”

“Nothing Thai please Balthazar, my stomach barely survived the last time.”

The Frenchman snorted with an exaggerated eye roll. “Pussy. I was thinking more comfort food. For you I will ruin my diet for one night, but you must go to the gym with me in the morning before our first classes.”

Castiel chuckled. “Sounds like a plan. I’ll see you guys tonight then. I’m going to go home and cuddle with my dog.”

Balthazar nodded as he tipped his hat and spun on his heel walking off into the University. Castiel slid off the hood of his car and got in, driving home, his heart a little lighter but the ache that missing his husband left was still there, if only muted for a little while. He sighed offering up another silent prayer, hoping to God that Dean would be home soon.

Part 2  
~~December 2012—10 months into the Tour~~

Castiel sighed as he rolled out of bed, Cujo was barking, probably wanting to go outside. He glared at the clock seeing that it was four in the morning and growling. He was on Christmas break from the University and it had snowed all during the night and was cold as hell. He pulled on one of Dean’s sweaters, one that still had his scent clinging to it and he sighed as it brushed his upper thighs and the sleeves going nearly to his fingertips. He hugged the warm garment close and started padding out of the room until he heard a curse and someone fumbling in the entryway. He felt fear seize up in his heart and he grabbed a lamp that was on one of the hall tables before creeping forward to the door. He saw a hulking shape bent down and he could still hear Cujo barking and growling. Castiel felt along the wall and found the switch to flip it on when Cujo lunged at the person making him yelp. 

“Damnit Cujo! Get off me you big lug!” A familiar voice called out making Castiel stop and gape.

“Dean?”

Dean laughed as he held his arm up against Cujo’s front, keeping the snarling dog off of him. “Hey Cass, mind getting the dog off of me?”

“Cujo! Fuß!” He barked and snapped his fingers. The massive bunch of fur hopped off of Dean and padded over to sit in front of Castiel, still growling as he watched the other man. Castiel patted his head, “braver hund.” He snapped his fingers again pointing to the dog bed in the living room and watched as Cujo growled at Dean again and sulked off. 

“German?” Dean asked with an arched eyebrow.

“People say that dogs respond better to German because it’s a commanding language. The Police officer who ran the obedience classes used German and Cujo responded to it. What are you doing here Dean?”

Dean smiled and stood up from the floor. “I wanted to surprise you. You know for Christmas, Mom said that the only thing you asked for was me to be home. It’s not for good, but I was able to squeeze out some R&R for two and a half weeks. Now do I get a hug and kiss from my beautiful husband?”

Castiel set the lamp down and launched himself into Dean’s arms, kissing him hard. Castiel felt the tears fall down his cheeks as he clutched onto Dean taking his scent. “God your home, you’re fucking home for Christmas.”

Dean chuckled, “less words Cass, right now I need to fuck you then after that make love.” Dean slid a hand into Castiel’s hair and kissed him desperately. He moved them around so that Castiel was pressed against the wall, his hand fumbling into the hall table for the little tube of lube that they stored there, hoping that Castiel didn’t move it. He pulled back with a laugh as he pulled it out, “I can’t believe you kept it here.”

Castiel moaned arching into him as Dean nipped at his neck. “Just figured when you did come home this would be the first place we stopped.”

Dean chuckled as he tugged at Castiel’s sweatpants making them pool at the man’s feet. He ran his fingers along Castiel’s hips and moaned softly. “Baby you are still so beautiful, but I think you’ve lost weight.”

Castiel sighed and slid his fingers to link at the back of Dean’s neck and tug his mouth down. “Talk later Dean, please, I’ve missed you and I need you…toys aren’t enough.” He smirked as he watched heat pool in those green eyes and moaned loudly when he felt slick fingers at his hole making him arch against the wall. “Fuck Dean, you’re still really quick with that.”

Dean chuckled as he bent down to suck a mark onto his husbands neck as he slid a single finger in, taking his time to prep his husband. “Cass, fuck, you’re so tight.”

He moaned grinding down onto his fingers. “Dean, fucking hell just shut up and have at it already. I won’t break and I’ve missed you so much.” He lifted Dean’s head and kissed him lightly. “Please Dean, I need you now.”

Dean growled and nodded as he set a furious pace of prepping Castiel. He slid a second finger in as their kiss was a clash of teeth and tongue as he stretched and lubed him up. 

He moaned when he felt Castiel’s hands at the belt of his BDUs and slid in another finger, thrusting and searching for the spot that would make the dark haired beauty melt in his arms. He felt Castiel seize up in his arms and smirked as his angel moaned loudly and blunt nails dug into the back of his neck. He pulled back and smiled, “Slick me up Cass, want to feel your hands on me.”

Castiel smirked up at him. “I’ve got something better.” He dropped down to his knees and pulled Dean’s pants open smiling as his thick cock sprung out, hard and leaking. He slowly began to stroke as he leaned forward and licked up the pearly drop of precum at the tip, moaning at the taste he had missed for the last ten months. He heard Dean’s breathy moan and smiled as he glanced up to see him braced against the wall while his other hand slid into his hair. Castiel locked his eyes with Deans as he opened his mouth and began to sink down on his cock, moaning at the feel of his solider in his mouth again. 

Dean moaned as he slid his hand into Castiel’s wild soft hair as he watched his husband sink down on his cock. It felt like heaven and he felt his heart in his throat. “Fuck baby you are so beautiful. Can still fuckin take my cock like a pro.” He moaned. He felt Castiel take him down his throat and he gasped at the slick heat of his husband’s mouth. “Oh fuck, Cass, baby you need to stop.” He panted.

Castiel pulled back, his blue eyes filled with concern. “Are you ok?”

Dean chuckled as he pulled his angel up and pushed him against the wall again; hooking an arm under his leg and pulling him close. “Just don’t wanna cum till I’m inside you.” 

He smiled and lined himself up and slowly sank into his husband. He growled and whimpered as his forehead dropped to Castiel’s shoulder. “Fuck, baby you feel so good.  
Needed this for so long.” He panted as his hips moved in a stuttering rhythm as his hands grasped onto Castiel’s ass, sure to leave bruises in the morning. 

Castiel moaned loudly as he jerked his hips, making Dean sink in deeper with his nails leaving bloody crescent shaped marks. “D-Dean, not gonna last. Fuck.” He moaned. He let out a cry as one of Dean’s hands wrapped around his cock, stroking him hard and fast as his husband fucked him. He sobbed with bliss as he came in a white hot flash.

Dean moaned as he felt Castiel convulse around him and he gripped Castiel’s hips and a half dozen thrusts later he filled his husband with a roar. He placed a hand on the wall to keep them from falling as he panted and chuckled. “Fuck, I don’t think we’ve ever had sex like that for a long time.”

Castiel laughed softly as he dropped his legs and held Dean close. “But it was nice. God I missed you.”

He laughed softly and kissed his cheek. “I missed you too Cas. You’re on break right?”

“Mmhm.”

“So what do you say we don’t leave the bed tomorrow at all? I wanna have my first day back in the states to be just you and me.”

“As nice as that sounds Gabriel is coming over tomorrow for Christmas shopping. Your mother was nice enough to invite him to Christmas dinner and he wanted to get her something special.”

Dean sighed, “I’ll take a half day with you in bed then.”

Castiel chuckled. “Deal. C’mon, let’s go to bed.”

“No shower?”

“Tomorrow. Right now I wanna go back to sleep in our bed with the one man I love.”

“Then we better tell him to move over because I like to snuggle.”

Castiel laughed as he tugged Dean’s hand, taking him back into the bedroom. They fell into bed a tangle of lips and limbs, falling asleep in each other’s arms. The next few days went by in a blur of laughter, tears, and love as Dean fell back into his routine as if his life hadn’t stopped and he was in the midst of being blown up. Christmas Eve found everyone at John and Mary’s house for a big family dinner. Castiel sat next to Dean and looked around, Jessica and Sam were too busy making goo-goo eyes at each other, Gabriel as brought his girlfriend Kali to dinner, and Bobby, Ellen, and Jo all sat with Mary and John talking about Ellen’s bar. Castiel felt a squeeze on his leg and looked over to see Dean smiling at him. Castiel smiled back and leaned over for a kiss. “I’m glad your home.”

“Me too baby.” Dean grinned, his green eyes dancing in the light of the room. “So, we gonna get inked up before I leave?”

Castiel arched an eyebrow, “really Dean?”

“What? It’s harmless enough. Besides I found something I wanted to get.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a slip of paper and slid it across to Castiel. 

Castiel looked down to see a pentagram in a sun with black angel wings on either side of the sun. “What is it?”

“Supposed to be a symbol of protection, a friend of mine drew it up while we were over there. I asked her to add the wings because I wanted something to remind me why I was fighting.” His fingers brushed over the back of Castiel’s hand.

“I’ll go with you to the tattoo shop Dean. I doubt I’ll get one done but I’ll be there for yours.”

Dean grinned, “Alright sounds like a plan. Now let’s eat I’m starving for some of moms food.”

Castiel chuckled as they all bowed their heads for Mary to say a quick prayer before moving onto the food. He smiled happily as he watched his family together, everyone was happy enough that Dean was home, but he knew that with his departure looming before them that they were ignoring it in favor of enjoying the time they had. Castiel couldn’t help the little sliver of fear in his heart that this would be his last Christmas with Dean. His eyes blurred as he quickly stood up from the table and, with a muttered apology, ran out of the room. He darted through the kitchen and out the back door leading to the Winchesters spacious back yard. He sighed as he looked up to the full moon, tears falling from his eyes as he begged the universe to keep Dean safe. He felt a hand on his shoulder and turned to see his love standing behind him, his green eyes wide.

“Cass? Baby? What was that?” He asked.

“I’m sorry Dean, I just…it’s just…I don’t want you to leave again. I’m so fucking scared that you won’t come back.” He whispered, shivering as a gust of cold wind blew past him.

Dean sighed as he drew Castiel into his arms and held him close. “Baby, you know I’m going to do my damndest to come back to you. When I’m over there you are the only thing that keeps me sane. A few of my buddies make fun of me when I sit in that Humvee and look at your picture. They call me soft, but it doesn’t matter. I will always come back to you Cass.” Dean kissed the top of his head and sighed. “I promise I will come back, and it won’t ever be in a pine box.”

Castiel nodded hugging him close. “This is just so hard Dean. I think I underestimated how hard it was.”

Dean pulled back, “do you regret it?” He asked softly.

“God above no Dean. I could never regret saying yes to you. I love you with all my heart and I will be waiting for you when you get home.” Castiel stood on tip toe to kiss him soundly. He pulled back keeping his lips close, just brushing against Dean’s as he spoke. “I love you. I will always love you Dean, no matter what.”

“I love you too Cass, you’re my saving grace and my angel.” He kissed him softly. “Now let’s get back inside, Mom was getting ready to bring out the pie.”

Castiel laughed as he was tugged back into the house by his overeager husband. He knew that the next year was going to be hell but he would push through it as long as it was his husband came home to him.

Part 3  
~~April 2013—14 months into tour~~

“Alright, who can tell me what Poe was trying to say with his poem ‘A Dream within a Dream’?” Castiel asked his class, leaning back against his desk. “Yes Sarah?”

“He’s asking the person not to let him go. He doesn’t want it to all be a dream; he wants it to be real.”

“A valid point, anyone else.” He looked around the classroom ready to call on someone when the door burst open and Sam ran in. Castiel blinked. “Sam? What’s going on? I’m-”

“Deans been hurt! He was flown into the hospital last night.”

Castiel felt his heart drop, “Dean’s hurt?” He felt something pressed to his chest and looked down to see his coat and briefcase shoved against his chest by his TA. “Samandriel?”

“Go with your brother-in-law, I will cover your classes and tell Naomi. Make sure Dean is ok; we miss our cute Grunt friend running around here.”

Castiel nodded as he was pulled out of the classroom by Sam. The ride to the hospital was a blur and when they got there Castiel was swept up into Mary’s arms. “Mary is Dean?”

“John is in with him right now.” She hugged him tight. “They say he should make it and with physical therapy be almost good as new.”

“Mom what happened? Dad wouldn’t say over the phone.” Sam asked quietly.

“An IED, the medic that pulled Dean out, and came over with him said that it completely blew their Humvee, several of the other guys died, but one of the men sacrificed himself for Dean, shielding him from most of the blast.”

“C-Can I see him?” Castiel asked softly.

Mary nodded as she led him to Dean’s room. She opened the door to see John with his head bowed and Dean asleep. John looked up as they walked in and quickly stood up, kissing his wife’s cheek and pulling Castiel into his arms. “Hey Cass, the doctors just gave him something to sleep. He’ll be out for a couple of hours.” He said gruffly.

“Can I stay with him please?”

“Stay as long as you want kid. Mary and I will tell everyone that Dean’s resting and that you’re here. We all got our time in; he’d like to see your face when he wakes up.” John smiled patting his shoulder and then both he and Mary walked out of the room, closing the door softly behind them.

Castiel walked on shaky legs to Dean’s bedside and took the chair that John recently vacated. He sat down and reached out to take Dean’s hand. His husband was pale against the sickly green hospital gown, a tube in his nose to help get oxygen, bandages were wrapped around his head and covered one eye, his left leg was in a cast, and that was the most damage Castiel could see. He stroked his husband’s calloused skin and dropped his head down to press warm fingers to his forehead. “I’m right here my solider, whenever you are ready to wake up.” He whispered softly as his eyes slid closed.

Dean slowly opened his unbandaged eye, his mind fogged by medication and he heard a shuffling off to his left. He looked over to see a tall man in a lab coat checking the vitals. 

“Hey Doc.” He muttered, making the man turn around.

“It’s good to see you awake Mr. Winchester. I wanted to go over a few things, just to be sure that you’re memory and other cognitive functions are still fine. Do you remember your name?” He asked as he raised the bed so that Dean was sitting up.

“Dean Winchester.”

“Good, and your rank in the U.S. Army?”

“I’m an E-5 medic, for the 42nd Engineer Company.”

The Doctor nodded. “Good, let’s go back a bit and test your memory from before you entered the Army. What High School did you go to?”

“Lawrence High.”

“Name the members of your living family and their relation to you.”

“John Winchester, father, Mary Winchester, mother, Sam Winchester, younger brother, and Castiel Winchester, husband.”

The doctor nodded. “Alright, your long-term memory seems to be fine, let’s try something more recent. Who flew with you to the states?”

“Specialist Benny Lafitte of the 42nd Engineer Company.”

“Good, good, do you remember who I am?”

“Yeah Doctor Zeke.” Dean grinned seeing the other man’s eye twitch at the nickname. “Everything good Doc?”

“So it would seem. Now, you will be starting physical therapy in eight weeks to finish healing up your leg-”

The door opened and Dean looked over to see Castiel with a cup of coffee. He grinned at seeing the blue eyed man still dressed in his teaching suit with a tan trench coat thrown over his suit and his blue tie skewed. “Now there’s my angel.” He laughed.

“Dean!” Castiel cried, dropping his cup as he launched himself to the bed and wrapped his arms around Dean’s neck. “You’re finally awake, I should have been here…I should-”

“Cass, baby calm down.” Dean said softly holding the smaller man close and kissing his forehead. “It’s ok, you’re here that’s all that matters.”

Castiel pulled back to say something when a cough caught his attention and he looked up to see a Doctor standing on the opposite side of the bed. “Oh, forgive me. I’m Castiel Winchester, Dean’s husband.”

“I know. I’m Doctor Ezekiel; I was just about to give your husband a rundown of what was coming up for him. If you would like to sit you can hear it too and make sure he sticks to it.”

Castiel chuckled softly. “I can try, but it’s rare that Dean listens to me.” He smiled lovingly at the man as he laced their fingers together.

“Right, well as I was saying Dean is in for some physical therapy once his cast is off. Depending on how his scan goes when he comes in for his checkup in six weeks we can get the cast off and do some physical therapy. Now I would also like him to begin sessions with a therapist, just in case of PTSD, at least see Dr. Barns once, she is very unorthodox and given how you are Mr. Winchester I think she is a perfect match.”

Dean rolled his eyes, “wonderful a shrink.” He muttered.

“Is there any way to meet Dr. Barns beforehand? Just to see if she is alright, Dean has issues with psychologists.”

“I can page for her and see if she is free before you leave the hospital.”

“Wait I can leave today?” Dean asks, his good eye perking up.

“Only if your labs come back, we should be able to remove the bandages from your head. Specialist Lafitte as well as the other doctors did a good job on patching you up before bringing you home, and so far you have made a spectacular recovery. You had an angel looking out for you son.”

Dean smiled over to Castiel and squeezed his hand, “yeah I did Doc.”

Ezekiel nodded, “I will send in Nurse Masters to get those bandages checked out, we should have your labs back soon but as far as I can tell you are good to go home, and I trust that your family will keep you from doing anything to damage yourself even further.”

Castiel nodded, “I can take a sabbatical off of work for a little while, thank you for everything.”

“Don’t thank me; you need to be thanking the man who saved his life.” With that Ezekiel left the room and Castiel turned to Dean.

Dean grinned at him and held open his arms. “Come here Angel.”

Castiel carefully climbed onto the bed and curled against Dean’s side, he laid his head on Dean’s chest and listened to the strong steady beat of his heart. “Dean, I don’t think you’re ready to talk about what happened, but just so you know I’m here for when you do.” He said softly, knowing that it takes time for Dean to talk about his feelings. Hell it took the man two years to finally say ‘I love you’.

Dean smiled softly kissing the top of his head. “I know Angel; you’re always here for me, knowing what I need. I love you for that.” He lifted Castiel’s chin and laid a soft kiss on his lips. “I love you baby.”

“I love you too Dean.”

Dean stroked his hand down Castiel’s back and a sly grin spread over his face. “You know, we’ve never had sex in a hospital-”

“Dean!”

“What? It’s exactly the kind of care I need.”

“Dean your leg is broken and not to mention all the other injuries you have suffered.”

“But Cass!” He whined. “Nothing is more healing to me than your touch. Please Angel? I’ve missed you so much.”

Castiel sighed, “You are incorrigible.”

Dean grinned pulling Castiel on top of him, his hands resting on the other man’s hips. “You are so beautiful like this.” He smiled as he slid his hand up, slipping under Castiel’s  
shirt to brush his fingers along the warmed skin. He leaned back against the raised bed and watched Castiel. He looked tired, with bags under his eyes, his hair was messy from his habit of running his fingers through it instead of using a brush, and his eyes sparkled with all the love that Dean knew he gave in return. “You are beautiful Angel. How did I get lucky enough to have you in my life?”

Castiel snorted, “You barged into my classroom looking for Sam.”

Dean gave a goofy smile and tugged Castiel down to kiss him, “Best mistake of my life.” He slowly slid his hands up and began to unbutton Castiel’s over shirt, he tugged the shirt off and smiled at seeing one of his band T’s under the shirt. “Since when did you start wearing ACDC?” He teased.

“Since this shirt still smelled like you and I missed you like hell.”

Dean arched an eyebrow. “Dude…”

“I mean it was still in your side of the closet next to your leather jacket, so it caught some of the scent. It was comforting.” A light blush stained his cheeks making Dean’s heart melt.

“You are a sentimental fool Mr. Winchester.” 

Castiel laughed as he bent down, “Only for you.”

“Hope I’m not interrupting, but really, you should lock the door if you want to fuck.” A woman said as she walked in carrying a folder in her arms, her brown hair tied back from her face.

Castiel slid off Dean’s lap quickly, his cheeks bright red and eyes cast down to the floor. Dean glared at the woman, “and who are you?”

“Meg Masters, I’m your nurse. I get the joy of checking you out of here and sending your ass home.”

“Then get to it, I want out of here, hospitals give me the creeps.”

Meg rolled her eyes and opened up the folder laying it out on Dean’s tray. “Alright, just sign a few forms and all is ready to go. Who’s gonna be taking you home?”

“I am,” Castiel said quietly.

“You’ll need to sign this and I’ll give you a list of things that need to be done.” She said handing him some papers. She watched them both closely and took the signed forms before handing Castiel another paper. “Alright, this is a list of things that you have to do. Since Dean is in a cast he can’t get it wet, so you get the joys of helping with the baths, you can do this a few ways, sponge and wrapping the thing in plastic and helping him into the shower. He’s going to have some medications to help with the pain levels, we’re going to give him Vicodin, and he’ll need to take two tablets every four to six hours depending on how he’s doing with the pain. Never go over 8 pills a day and for the love of god don’t mix with alcohol. Unless Dr. Barns says something about a medication from her then don’t mix it with anything. At all, I don’t want to see you in here unless it’s to get a clean bill of health, you hear me?”

“Damn, for a nurse your bedside manner sucks.”

She shrugged with a smirk as she handed over the file and moved to grab a pair of scissors. “How about we get those bandages off and check out the stiches.” She stepped closer and clipped along the bandages before unwinding them slowly. 

Castiel felt his heart leap in his throat as he saw the bruised and battered skin with harsh stitching over his eye and along his temple, with some of his hair shaved off. He saw Dean’s face fall and he sighed. “It’s alright Dean-”

“Looks worse than it is, Brotha.” A smooth southern voice floated over making Castiel turn around to see a man leaning against the door.

“Well, look what the vampires dragged in.” Dean snorted with a grin. “How the hell did you get past Dr. Zeke? I thought he told you to scram.”

“I’ll be back in a bit with the rest of the papers.” Meg said as she beat a hasty retreat from the room.

“Aw you know me Winchester, I ain’t gonna go nowhere when one o’my boys is still hurt.”

“I out rank you Lafitte.”

The man smirked. “Sure you do, but that don’t mean I ain’t gonna treat ya like my little brother. And I did pull your ass outta that fire. I had to see how you were Brotha.” The man’s blue eyes lost a bit of their shine as he watched Dean.

Dean sighed and waved him over. “Yeah I know Benny.” He smiled taking Benny’s forearm. “Benny, this is my husband Castiel. Cass, this is Benny Lafitte. He’s the one who pulled my ass outta that Humvee and saved my life.”

Benny smiled and took off his hat holding out a hand to Castiel. “It’s a pleasure to meet ya Castiel, Dean’s done nothing but talk bout you since we deployed. Most of the guys got tired of hearing bout it, but not me. The way he talked about you reminded me of my own wife Andrea.”

Castiel blushed hotly, “thank you for saving Dean. I don’t know what I would have done if he was gone.”

“Don’t mention it; I was glad to bring him home to you.”

“Do you still gotta go back?” Dean asked quietly.

“Yeah, you know it’s bad over there Dean, I gotta go back and help our boys as much as I can, ‘specially since you are out of commission. I still have a tour to finish.” Benny’s eyes were dark. “But they gave me two weeks, mostly to make sure you are ok.”

“If you wanna go see Andrea go ahead, I have Castiel. And I know she misses you.”

Castiel chewed on his lip, “Benny, I would like you and Andrea to come to dinner before you leave again. I want to let her know that she’s got a friend in town. Someone who gets what she’s going through.”

Benny grinned and nodded, “sounds mighty fine. Thank you Castiel.”

“How about Friday night? Do you have any requests?”

“I don’t suppose you can cook Cajun…”

Castiel grinned, “Of course I can. Just tell me what you would like and I’ll see what I can whip up.”

Dean grinned as he watched Benny and Castiel talk about food items. He settled back onto the bed until something on Castiel’s arm caught his eye. “Cass what’s that?” He asked pointing to Castiel’s arm.

Castiel blushed and rubbed the back of his neck. “Oh, I wanted to show you earlier, but I got distracted.” He bit his lower lip and pulled the shirt off turning his back to Dean.  
Dean and Benny gaped at the beautiful wings on his back done in black ink highlighted with blues and greens giving the wings dimension and looking like they would pop off his skin at any minute. In the middle of the wings was the five pointed star in the middle of a sun, just like the tattoos that Dean and Sam got. “Cass?”

“I wanted to surprise you, you keep calling me your angel and I figured…an angel needs wings. But I wanted something that was a part of you too so I just took the picture you had and had them do my wings differently.”

“I ain’t ever seen an Angel with black wings. But they work for you Castiel.” Benny said with a smile.

Dean grinned. “And you always said you wouldn’t get inked. How long did that take?”

“Three sessions plus a touch up. Each session lasted about four hours.” Castiel said as he pulled the shirt back on and sat on the bed by Dean’s hip.

Dean grinned as the door opened and Meg walked back in slapping down some folders. “Alright, you both are ready to go. Take his sorry ass home and make sure he follows all the rules.” She said with a nod as she turned on her heel and walked out.

Benny laughed and put his hat back on his head. “And that’s my cue to leave. Andrea and I will see you for dinner on Friday.” He nodded as he walked out leaving the two lovers alone.

Castiel sighed as he took the papers and slid them into his briefcase before turning to Dean. “Ready to get dressed and go home?”

“You have no idea baby. Get me the fuck out of here, the sooner I’m home the sooner I can have you.” Dean grinned as he, with the help of Castiel, got dressed.

Epilogue  
~~November 2013—7 months home~~

The next seven months went by in a flash; Dean was on his way to healing up just fine, so far with only a minor limp that Ezekiel says could or could not be permanent. Castiel never strayed far from Dean’s side during his recovery, only to go to the University to teach. Dean got his job back at Bobby Singer’s garage for something to do so he didn’t go crazy. They both kept in contact with Benny, and made time to hang out with Andrea if she needed someone to talk to when Benny being away got to be too much for her. Everything was fairly normal; Dean was even seeing Dr. Pamela Barns on a regular basis to help manage his PTSD and his time in the war. He rarely talked to Castiel about it, but would when the nightmares became too much or something set him off. He just had to remember the tricks she had taught him to cope when he felt the panic start to swell up. Dean liked to think he was coping fairly well, but when he had his bad days the shook him, his only saving grace was the man who never pushed him to talk and held him through the tremors. Today was one such day; he had a flashback during work when an old truck backfired. Bobby had gotten Dean into the office and called Castiel.

Castiel opened the door to the office to see Dean with his head bowed and his hands clasped in front of him. “Dean?”

Dean sighed as he lifted his eyes; they looked hollow and dull making Castiel’s heart clench. “Hey Cass.”

“Are you okay?” He asked softly as he knelt down in front of him and laid his hands over Dean’s.

“No, not really. Having a freak out will do that to you.”

Castiel nodded, “Dr. Barns said that this would happen, and that in your case they won’t happen often but it will still shake you. But you are getting better.”

Dean sighed, “Yeah I know baby. Can we just go home?”

“Yeah, let’s go home. I was thinking of making those bourbon burgers you like so much.”

Dean gave him a weak smile as he let his husband pull him to his feet. “Sounds good Cass.” He says softly, lacing his fingers with Castiel’s and letting his angel be his guiding light from the darkness of his thoughts.

Once home, things got…simple. Dean stood in the kitchen watching Castiel move around as he cooked. It was too cold to use the grill out on the deck so Castiel was cooking the burgers on the stove. The delicious scent filled the kitchen making Dean’s stomach rumble. They had changed into lounge clothes and he watched as Castiel moved around the kitchen in a simple wife beater and dark blue lounge pants, the black of his tattoo showing against his skin and through the thin shirt. Dean moved behind him and laid his fingertips on the wings. 

“Dean?”

“The flash back…it was of Gordon throwing himself over me when we got hit.”

“Dean you don’t have to-”

“Please Cass, if I don’t talk about it now, with someone it’ll kill me.” Dean whispers softly as he wraps his arms around Castiel’s waist, laying his head on the back of his neck.

Castiel nods and flips off the stove and moving the burgers off the heat and covering them. He presses back against Dean and lays his arms over Dean’s. He could feel his husband’s breathe against the back of his neck and he brushed his fingers along Dean’s hands.

“Gordon Walker was this punk who had no respect for anyone. He fought everyone and craved death. His family was killed when the towers fell. He harbored a lot of hate and a lot of anger. He was a damned good solider though, followed his orders, did his job, but he took any chance he could get to shoot at the enemy.” Dean sighed. “We were in the middle of an argument when the first truck got hit. We heard it over the com, and then our truck flipped with the shockwave. We also got hit by something else I don’t know what, but it blew through the underside of our truck. Gordon had thrown himself over me saying I had to stay alive no matter what. Nothing was more important than a medic, not even a grunt like him. When they pulled us out…he had shrapnel in his back, his arm was broken, and his leg was severed. We tried everything we could but he was bleeding more than we could deal with. I still remember that look in his eyes, he wasn’t a man at that point Cass, he was a scared little boy who knew he was going to die. In the wrong moment he realized that his life did mean something.” Dean sighed closing his eyes. “The backfiring of the truck sounded so close to the explosion that all I saw was Gordon on top of me. I could feel it all again Cass, I could smell burning skin, blood, heated metal. It was like I was back; I never want to go back.”

Castiel turned in Dean’s arms. “You don’t have to baby. You’re done, you’re here. You got your purple heart and your home with me.” Castiel took one of his hands and laid it over the steady beat of his heart. “You are home, you never have to go back. You’ve got your job with Bobby, your family is here an always around, and you have me in your bed every night. ”

Dean slid his hand up to cup Castiel’s cheek. “My angel.” He whispered softly as he bent his head to kiss Castiel softly.

**Author's Note:**

> Got something you want me to write? Let me know either in comments or on my tumblr.
> 
> dark-huntress-moony.tumblr.com


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